HUMOR: Kindness to Animals

Not mine.  From here.

A minister was talking to a children's Sunday School class about kindness to animals. He spoke about the Biblical references to substantiate his case. 
"Now let's suppose," he said, " that you saw a bad person cutting off the tail of a cat. What Biblical quotation would you use to tell him of the terrible wrong he was doing?"

"Sir, I would point out to him," one of the students said, "What God hath joined together, let no man put asunder. (Matthew. 19:v6)

HUMOR: Interpetation is key

Not mine. Found online.

One Sunday, after church, Mom asked her little daughter what the Sunday school lesson was about. Her daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilts." Needless to say, Mom was perplexed.

Later in the day, the pastor stopped by for tea. Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about.

He said, "Be not afraid, thy Comforter is coming."